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Joba Chamberlain – The 22 year old pitching phenom of the New York Yankees. His mound presence is unequaled amongst pitchers in his age group.

Terminator- A cybernetic organism from the future hell bent on the assassination of the only threat to its existence….Sarah Connor.

Jobinator- A pitcher of pure domination and the future of his franchise, and with a steely calm collective cool he’s hell bent on the destruction of the main threat to his teams advancement….The Boston Red Sox.

The Target- Defending world champion Boston Red Sox.

The Weaponry-

1. Fastball- ranges from the mid to upper 90’s reaching over 100mph

2. Slider- A knee-buckling pitch that has received perfect ratings from the scouts, and has batters striking out at an alarming rate.

3. Change-up- 80-82 MPH that has grown significantly better and more reliable.

4. Curveball- Rated above average it’s one of the pitches he’s shied away from in the setup role, and could prove to be the off-speed pitch that can catapult him to ace status.

5. He’s been toying with various techniques from some of the vets in the Yankee system. How has their experience prepared him for the start today? We’ll soon find out.

The Mission- Using pinpoint accuracy,sheer determination, and lack of any conscience suppress and destroy the offensive attack of the enemy.

Pre Game

Joe Morgan and Jon Miller lead the way with their awful vernacular letting us know that Joba has his hands full with the Sox, as the Sox make the best adjustments amongst any team offensively…even though they had no statistical means to back that up with.
This game has a lot of meaning for both teams as they find themselves trailing the Rays, and really can’t afford to lose ground to both of their division rivals on the same day. Wakefield takes the mound for the Sox, and as Fox so graciously reminded us it’ll be 104 mph vs. 54!

We'll also take note of the fact both teams have some serious injury concerns, yet have been playing admirable ball. The Yankees find themselves without Matsui and Damon, and also have an ailing catcher in Jorge Posada. The Sox are still without vaunted slugger David Ortiz, and for some reason Manny has the day off.

First Inning

Joba vs. Jacoby- Well we start off on a quick 2-0 as Miller can’t believe the pitch down the middle was called a ball…regardless Jacoby weakly grounds out to A-Rod as Ellsbury’s slump continues.
His next opponent is the worst all star of the year Dustin Pedroia (how the hell isn’t Kinsler starting over him?). Joba will look to end his 13 game hit streak on this 2-2 pitch….another weak grounder to A-Rod two gone. Never mind that worst all star of the year comment I forgot Varitek made the team.
No Manny no Ortiz no problem JD Drew has owned pitching lately, but unfortunately there’s no action as a borderline 99mph goes for a ball and Drew draws a walk without swinging his bat.
Lowell (leads the Sox in RBI by the way) swings at the first pitch and grounds to A-Rod to end the inning…the always necessary reminder that A-Rod tied a record for assists in an inning is needed.

Morgan tells us everyone is fast against a knuckleballer, but he obviously hasn’t seen Jose Molina run…maybe he’ll change his opinion later.

Second Inning

Youk takes an 0-2 fastball that caught too much of the plate to right field and the Sox get the lead off hitter on.
Joba gets Sean Casey looking on the 3-2 slider, and Youk gets nailed on the attempted theft.
Coco is treated to the first curve of the night and two tough sliders as he grounds out to Jeter.

A-Rod ties the Mick to put him 13th all time on the MLB Home Run list. There’s where the old knuckleball saying comes into play…If it’s high let it fly. If It’s low let it go. That was a high knuckler from Wakefield that A-Rod lasered into left field.

Third Inning

Footage of a waterfall that cost 15.5 million (baseball fans think the Yanks and Sawx spend too much) takes us into the third inning as Joba quickly K’s Lugo on three pitches.
Gammons informs us that the Brewers just have to cross the O’s to get a trade done for CC, and Cash follows with another weak grounder to the left side of the infield.
3-2 to Jacoby…Joba hits his spot with the heater and Ellsbury rolls another weak grounder to Cano at second.

Fourth Inning

Pedroia gives his patented uppercut swing to dig himself an 0-2 hole, and Joba finishes the job by getting Dustin to ground weakly to SS getting him out by a step, but Pedroia still felt the need to bitch about it.
Drew pops up the 2-1 pitch after he makes contact off the end of the bat.

Fifth Inning

Joba’s still hitting his spots, but all star Youk flips the bat out on the 0-2 and again grabs himself a base hit. Has there ever been an ensemble of worse All Stars from one team than Pedroia, Tek, Youk, Drew ?!? The all star balloting system is atrocious…I mean they let each fan/email address vote 20 times? Why?
Casey rips a single down the right field line leading to a first and third no one out jam for Joba to work his way out of.
Crisp will be looking for some redemption for last night’s inability to drive in the game tying run. Joba takes him to 1-2 and will be looking for that much needed K…ball 2 up high Crisp made a weak effort but checked the bat…slider foul out of play…ball 3 high and outside…ball 4 in the dirt ,wild pitch, and Youk slides into Joba’s legs. Tie game 1-1.
Joba had Crisp and let him go we’ll see what he has for Lugo, and his .153 RISP average. Julio fouls two off and is quickly 0-2. Slider way off the plate gets Lugo chasing, and that’ll put a dent in that massive .153 average.
Kevin Cash will be looking to get the job done now, and Joba would have had him 0-2, but a perfect pitch is called ball one and Kevin finds himself with a favorable 2-1 pitch…the curve brings it back to 2-2, and has been a good looking pitch for Joba tonight, and Joba freezes him with the Slider…2 down.
Morgan just said Joba is pitching rather than throwing…well he better keep it up as Jacoby strides to the plate desperately looking for a hit….3-1 after he missed with the slider, and Jacoby just watches the 3-1 fastball bringing the count to 3-2…check swing…hardly…Joba had him swinging at a ball in the dirt, but it was ruled held up….very borderline.
Pedroia steps to the plate with bases loaded and two out. Fastball strike one 94 MPH, well the ridiculousness of the overrated Pedroia continues as a fastball that ate him up dumps into right field for two runs. The one gleaming fact that I can take from Pedroia’s MLB career is that he’s convinced the Sox he’s good, so he’ll most likely get to suck for them for the next few years before they realize just how much he does suck.
That will run Joba up to 90 pitches so far, and cause some stirring in the bullpen. Drew will look to continue the “onslaught”….2-2….strike three swinging. Sox lead 3-1.

Sixth Inning

Joba’s looking to get through an inning quickly after the fiasco that unfolded in the fifth. Mike Lowell will look to keep him on the ropes…1-2…the slider is rolled to Jeter…Lowell is 0-3.
Youk who started the “rally” last inning will look for his third hit of the day…1-1…pitch behind Youk and some stares are exchanged…3-2…ball 4 low and away.
Casey hits a hot shot to Giambi at first, but Jason snares it throws to Jeter, who completes the double play with Youk bearing in on him….well turned.

Seventh Inning

That will do it for Joba. He departs on the losing end of a 3-2 game. All in all a great outing was wasted by a ball that dropped in from Pedroia, but Joba had the chance to put away Coco and blew it. The umpiring was suspect behind the plate as evident by Girardi’s ejection…only his second this year. Joba showed his ability to handle the Sox, and should have more favorable outings in the future.